Valentine’s Day Lesson – True Love
Here’s a Valentine’s Day youth group lesson that gets students thinking about what it really means to love Jesus, not just “do church stuff.”
It uses John 15:9 and Revelation 2:4 to compare the typical idea of “falling in love” with the kind of steady, faithful love God shows us in Jesus. The goal is to help students ask, “Am I staying close to Jesus or just staying busy?”
Big Idea: God shows us what true love looks like by the way that He loves us.
It includes a fun opening game to help break the ice and set up the lesson.
Nick Diliberto
Founder of Ministry to Youth
Looking for youth ministry curriculum? Check out this new bundle:
Valentine’s Day & Winter Olympics Bundle – Save 78% on 4 youth ministry series on the topic of “love”, our new Under Pressure series, and 12 Winter Olympic Games!
Now, here’s the Valentine’s Day lesson on True Love!
Bible: John 15:9; Revelation 2:4
Bottom Line: God shows us what true love looks like by the way that He loves us.
Supplies
- Bags of conversation hearts candy (you can buy them on Amazon or a local store)
- 6 bowls
- Long table
- Hearts for each student (foam hearts, heart-shaped rocks, or anything similar)
Opening Game: Heart to Heart
Game Setup:
- You’ll need several bags of conversation hearts candy.
- Divide the group into three equal teams.
- Set up a long table with three bowls placed across from where the teams will line up.
- Each team should have a bowl of conversation hearts, starting with about 10 hearts per student or more if you want the game to last longer.
- Have each team line up single file behind their bowl. Explain that today you are testing their commitment to love.
How to Play:
When you say “GO,” the first person in each line will grab a heart, place it on their forehead, put their hands behind their back, and run to the bowl on the table. Without using their hands, they must drop the heart from their forehead into the bowl. Then they run back and tag the next person in line. If a heart drops, the student should run back, grab another heart, and try again. If someone has to retry five times, they should tag the next person and move on. The team with the most hearts in their bowl at the end wins.
Tie Game Into the Lesson:
During that game, everything revolved around hearts and Valentine’s candy. Today we’re going to talk about what those hearts are supposed to represent. Not the holiday version of love, but what real love actually looks like.
Teach – True Love
Begin by asking students how many of them would say they’ve “been in love.” If your group is on the younger side, acknowledge that the question might feel awkward and ease the tension with a short, lighthearted story about your own first crush or “first love.” Explain that some of them may not have experienced that yet, but they’ve definitely seen love in movies, TV shows, or songs. Ask for a few examples and let them respond. Then ask, “What usually happens when someone first falls in love? What do they think, feel, or do?” Write their answers where everyone can see them so you can come back to the list later. Gently guide the conversation toward ideas like constantly thinking about the person, wanting to talk all the time, and wanting to spend as much time together as possible.
From there, point out that we use the word “love” for almost everything: food, shows, phones—but real love goes much deeper. God shows us what true love looks like through Jesus. God loved the world so much that he sent his only Son to die for us, and that’s the clearest picture of love we will ever see. What God wants in return isn’t just good behavior or church attendance; God wants our love. It’s easy to let our relationship with God turn into routines, rules, or “church stuff,” but if we miss the fact that God is inviting us into a real relationship with him, we miss the point. The Bible is really one long love story of God pursuing people who often choose other things, and yet God keeps showing up with patience, grace, and faithful love.
Read John 15:9: “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love.”
Jesus is saying the same perfect, unbreakable love God the Father has for him is the love he has for us. His love isn’t temporary, shallow, or based on how well we behave. When Jesus tells us to “remain” in his love, he’s not saying, “Earn it.” He’s inviting us to stay close to him, to trust him, and to keep choosing relationship over empty rule keeping. Remaining in his love means remembering who Jesus is, remembering how deeply he loves us, and not drifting away when life gets busy or hard.
In the book of Revelation, Jesus sends messages to different churches. One letter goes to the church in Ephesus. At first, it sounds great. Jesus tells them he sees their hard work, perseverance, and commitment to truth.
But then he says in Revelation 2:4 (NASB): “But I have this against you, that you have left your first love.”
Help students see that the church hadn’t stopped believing in Jesus or doing good things, but they had lost their first love. Their relationship with Jesus had become more about doing the right things than loving him. They were busy for God, but not close to God.
Connect John 15:9 and Revelation 2:4 by explaining that Revelation shows what happens when people stop doing what Jesus invited them to do – remain in his love. The Ephesians didn’t fall away all at once; they drifted. Jesus wasn’t telling them to try harder or do more. He was calling them back to love, back to relationship, back to remembering why they followed him in the first place. Invite students to think honestly about their own relationship with God: Are they staying close to Jesus, or slowly drifting? Remind them that God’s question to each of us is simple and personal: “Do you love me?” We answer that question not just with words, but by how we choose, every day, to remain in his love.
Closing
Everyone is somewhere in their relationship with God. Some need to meet God for the first time, and others need to reconnect. Hand out the hearts (foam hearts, heart-shaped rocks, etc) to each student and invite them to hold onto it as a reminder this week. Close in prayer, encouraging students to listen and ask God to help them hear Him.
Small Group Questions
- When you think about “being in love” (from movies, shows, or real life), what are some common things people think, feel, or do?
- How is a relationship with God similar to a relationship with a person? How is it different?
- Why do you think ‘true love’ is such a difficult thing to find today?
- How would you describe God’s love?
- Have you ever felt like your relationship with God was more about rules, habits, or “church stuff” than about actually loving Jesus? Explain.
- Why do you think it’s so easy to drift away from our “first love” for Jesus without even noticing it happening?
- If you were honest, would you say right now you feel: close to Jesus, kind of distant, or somewhere in between? What makes you say that?
- What is one small, realistic step you could take this week to move closer to Jesus and remain in his love?
End Lesson
Looking for youth ministry curriculum? Check out this new bundle:
Valentine’s Day & Winter Olympics Bundle – Save 78% on 4 youth ministry series on the topic of “love”, our new Under Pressure series, and 12 Winter Olympic Games!