Want Students to Open Up? Try This.

Last week, I was a first-time leader at a Young Life camp. Although I’ve led or been a leader at over 30 youth ministry camps, this one was different—because of the emphasis on meeting up with students one-on-one.

Over the years, I’ve done this on an as-needed basis at camp and beyond. But at Young Life, it’s baked into the culture. It’s not optional. So one afternoon, I met up with four of the middle school boys in my cabin (the other leaders handled the rest). Each of those conversations lasted about an hour, and I was blown away by how great they went.

They opened up about struggles at home, school, and with friends. They talked honestly about what God is doing in their lives and how they want to follow Jesus in their everyday life. They shared in ways that never would’ve come out in a small group. It was amazing.

One student—let’s call him Cade—shared that his parents are recently separated. Because of that, there was a good chance he’d be moving out of state over the summer. That meant starting high school in a completely new place, with no friends, all while navigating the pain of divorce. He told me all of this and asked for prayer. So we prayed together.

A few days after camp, I talked to his mom—and she told me they decided not to move. What?!?! I couldn’t believe it. I was sure they were going to move. So cool! And now that he came to camp, I’m praying he gets plugged into our youth group.

If I hadn’t been intentional about meeting up with Cade one-on-one, I would’ve missed that conversation. I would’ve missed the chance to pray with him. I’m so glad we had the chance to connect!

I’m definitely going to be more intentional about one-on-one meetups heading into the school year. I hope you do too! Even better, I hope it’s embedded into the DNA of your youth ministry—so you have a team of leaders regularly connecting with students one-on-one.

Of course, be safe and wise about it. Always meet with students in public spaces, not completely isolated from others. Have a safety policy, and come up with your own set of do’s and don’ts.

One-on-one moments can be a game changer. Let’s not underestimate the power of presence, listening, and prayer. When it’s part of the culture—not just a nice extra—God shows up in ways we never could’ve planned.

Nick Diliberto

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